Review: The Season

Jonah Lisa Dyer & Stephen Dyer - The Season
Published: July 12, 2016 by Viking's Children
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Realistic Fiction
Pages: 326
Find on: Amazon, Book Depository, Goodreads
Rating: 3.5/5

She can score a goal, do sixty box jumps in a row, bench press a hundred and fifty pounds…but can she learn to curtsey?

Megan McKnight is a soccer star with Olympic dreams, but she’s not a girly girl. So when her Southern belle mother secretly enters her in the 2016 Dallas debutante season, she’s furious—and has no idea what she’s in for. When Megan’s attitude gets her on probation with the mother hen of the debs, she’s got a month to prove she can ballroom dance, display impeccable manners, and curtsey like a proper Texas lady or she’ll get the boot and disgrace her family. The perk of being a debutante, of course, is going to parties, and it’s at one of these lavish affairs where Megan gets swept off her feet by the debonair and down-to-earth Hank Waterhouse. If only she didn’t have to contend with a backstabbing blonde and her handsome but surly billionaire boyfriend, Megan thinks, being a deb might not be so bad after all. But that’s before she humiliates herself in front of a room full of ten-year-olds, becomes embroiled in a media-frenzy scandal, and gets punched in the face by another girl.

The season has officially begun…but the drama is just getting started.

This is so delightfully hilarious. And if you say, otherwise, I'll be sure to mail you a copy and - believe me - that's far from a bad thing.

Megan McKnight is a twenty-year soccer star and very legit about it (as in, vitamin-filled diets and super serious about college), living in an apartment with her sister, Julia, so when she discovers her mother has signed her up for the debutante ball, she's appropriately scandalized as she needs to prepare for the upcoming season. As in, soccer. However, her stage mom is adamant, she and Julia compete as debutantes as sisters. (By the way, this book isn't exactly Young Adult, it's more New Adult. Considering Megan is 20, not at home, and in college? Either way, I felt pleased to read an MC, so close an age to me.)

Much to Megan's surprise, becoming a debutante isn't as easy as she initially perceived. She has to learn to pour tea, place the correct amount of sugar, dress for dinner, and meet the escort who'll lead her through the gallant affair. They vary, of course. Megan fails through numerous tasks while the other girls sail, including her sister. The den mother, Ann, is unhappy over her constant failure and routinely tells her to go home.
"So yes, there will be parties, but these parties serve a greater purpose."

Several girls used this pause for a dainty sip of tea. Prissy bitches.
Like I said, this book is diehard hilarious. Which I didn't expect. I was practically smiling throughout the whole read. It takes place in Texas, which is exhibited so gorgeously. Megan and her father ride horses, but there is a scene I absolutely detest, and I felt the need to warn a few of you in advance. Apparently, hunting is a thing there. Wildlife, birds, etc. Megan and her friends were shooting innocent birds for dinner-related reasons. No likey.

Also, how has no one mentioned this quote?
(...) Zach noticed my gun case.

"You brought your own gun case?" he asked cheerfully. Was he ever in a bad mood?

"Present from my dad for my thirteenth birthday."

"Sweet," Zach said. "Does Julia have one?"

"No, she got diamond earrings."
Well...okay. We love you, Texas, but y'all are occasionally #ratchet.

Megan starts an initially innocent affair with her escort, Hank, who was mostly uninteresting. Who killed the book for me was Megan's mother. She was such a stage monster. She was always trying to take charge, forcing everyone - including her husband - to do what she said. Ironically, a teeny part of her reminded me of my own mother, but not in a bad way. More of the mother we all have, like, "I brought you a dress!" / "Mom, I don't want that!" / "Oh...okay. Well, keep it in your closet. You'll like it eventually."

Also: Megan and her family are extremely privileged, which I felt the book was trying to keep on the sly. They make frequent shopping sprees to Neiman Marcus, Bergdorf's, and Megan is mentioned wearing Calvin Klein. If you'd like to qualify to be a debutante, I assume you'd have to be A-List rich.

I was planning on five-starring this, but the ending killed the book for me. Megan was trying to act like she was all about girl power. For those who abhor spoilers, continue below. For those who don't, Megan is a giant spitball of self-feminism.

By the final chapter, Megan steals the Queen Bee's boyfriend, and it's completely brushed under the rug. Queen Bee, who is also a debutante, confronts Megan, sobbing and angry. Megan says she and her man. Andrew, are just friends, but two pages later, they're confessing their undying love for one another.  Megan, you actual thot. Really. You're on an all-girls' soccer team, and you don't know the #1 Rule of Girl Code? What the hell is wrong with you?

Besides the ending, the snooty boys, and Megan's mother, I did enjoy 89% of the book. It's so fun and funny and delightful and reminiscent of Meg Cabot's Royal Wedding without the royalty and just perfect for when you need a break from a dystopian.